Trigger warning: this article discusses a mental disorder.
Borderline personality disorder is considered one of the most complex disorders known to psychologists today. From constant misdiagnoses to therapists turning down patients, BPD is highly stigmatized as well as misunderstood in society and the mental health community alike. BPD can be considered an umbrella for a variety of different segments and mental illnesses that hinders a diagnosed individual from going about their lives normally. Though BPD patients must adapt, it is important for those around them to understand these elements and work with the individual accordingly.
In today’s feature, we will be discussing one particular symptom that several people diagnosed with BPD have struggled with – the fear of abandonment.
What is the fear of abandonment?
According to Lisa Fritscher at Very Well Mind “A fear of abandonment is a complex phenomenon that can stem from a variety of developmental experiences, including loss or trauma. This fear has been studied from a variety of perspectives,” she says. “Theories behind why fear of abandonment occurs include interruptions in the normal development of certain cognitive and emotional capacities, challenges with past relationships, and other problematic social and life experiences.”
Why do People with BPD Experience Fear of Abandonment?
People with borderline personality disorder fear abandonment, partly because they do not want to be alone. Sometimes they feel that they do not exist at all, often when they do not have someone who cares for them resulting in dissociation, self-harm, or suicidal thoughts or behaviors.
This particular symptom may be the result of past trauma, unstable relationships with friends, partners, or family members, neglect as a child, or loss of a loved one.
Common Signs of Abandonment Issues
When identifying whether one may struggle with abandonment issues, here are some things you need to consider in terms of their behavior.
Common signs of abandonment issues include –
- Giving too much or being overly eager to please.
- Jealousy in your relationship or of others.
- Trouble trusting your partner’s intentions.
- Feeling insecure about your relationship.
- Having difficulty in feeling intimate emotionally.
- Needing to control or be controlled by your partner.
If you or someone you know is struggling with abandonment issues, it may be beneficial to seek psychiatric care to eliminate or receive diagnosis.