The Importance of Checking Up on Loved Ones

We all have our fair share of bad days. That is just the certainty of life. We can go from high highs to low lows in a matter of minutes and vice versa. So, while that is the reality for a lot of us, one of the leading issues nowadays is that people assume their loved ones are okay based off of one little smile. The truth is that all of us would like to be reminded of our importance when, at times, it feels like we cannot muster the ability to say it to ourselves.

Why is there an issue?

Many people, especially those in the MENA region, often feel the need to put up a façade and try to hide everything they are going through. That is often due to the stigma that surrounds mental health disorders. It permeates a person’s tone of speech when they say things such as “there is nothing to be sad about, just ignore it and cheer up” or “this is not really that big of a deal, be grateful for the things you already have”. Because of this, a lot of people we know may not necessarily know how to reach out for help when they are struggling. They may feel uncomfortable speaking out about their struggles and may feel that it is best if they just sweep them under the rug until they go away. This is because of the culture we grew up in. Within this culture and from a very young age, we were taught that discussing our mental health is some sort of “taboo”. Because of that, the signs that our loved ones are not okay may not be as obvious and as clear-cut as we would expect them to be. Given that, I believe that it would be absolutely helpful to let those people know that we are there for them no matter what. Some may not want to talk about it at a specific moment but knowing that someone cares may be all they need to get through it.

Why is checking up on your loved ones important?

Although it may not seem like much but asking a loved one “how have you been lately?” proves to the person that they are cared for. By being the first to ask someone about their mental health, you could be giving them the push they needed to open up and be honest with themselves and with you. Everybody wants to be heard. Everybody wants to be listened to. Everybody wants to be acknowledged. In that same sense, one small text that says “I heard the song you like on the radio and I thought of you” or “I hope you are doing well” goes a long way. Everything that may seem simple to you can make a huge difference to somebody else.

What can you do?

Checking in can look like a lot of different things. Also, a method that may work with one friend may not work for another friend. With that being said, always make sure you are approaching a loved one in a way that is beneficial to them.

A quick text message – whether it be by WhatsApp, Snapchat, Twitter or Instagram, or other means of communication – can make the biggest difference. It can be as simple as a short message that shows them that you are there for them if they ever need anything. By asking them how they are and how they are doing, especially during the challenging times we are going through, it can go a long way. A phone call may remind your loved one that you are willing to talk about and discuss their struggles with them. In some cases, people may not be looking for advice but are rather just wishing to find somebody to vent to. Be that person. Truly listen to what they are saying. It is as simple as that.