There are a lot of misconceptions about what boundaries are and what they do for relationships. We may feel that boundaries are unnecessary because our partner is supposed to already know and act on our needs and wants. However, a relationship cannot be fully healthy until both partners communicate their boundaries clearly, and the other person respects them.
Personal Boundaries
Healthy boundaries in a relationship do not come naturally, nor do they come easily. Our boundaries, whether they are big or small, are important and deserve to be respected. Here are some tips to help you get started with the establishment of your boundaries –
- Be honest, but respectful, when sharing your thoughts and feelings with your partner.
- Making assumptions can create a lot of misunderstandings in a relationship. You may feel like you know your partner very well to a point where you feel that you are entitled to assume what they want or need without asking them, but it is always your best bet to ask rather than assume.
- Setting boundaries and not executing them lets the other person think that they have an excuse to continue to overstep your boundaries. You should not make any exceptions to your own boundaries without careful consideration because you may soon find yourself on compromising things that are not acceptable to you.
Their Importance
Establishing healthy boundaries in a relationship is extremely important. It allows both partners to feel comfortable and develop positive self-esteem. In order to establish boundaries, you need to be clear with your partner about who you are, what you want, your beliefs and values, and your limits. A lot of times, we tend to focus on adjusting to others, taking time away from focusing on ourselves. Setting boundaries for yourself that reflect who you are and who you ultimately want to be will only enhance setting boundaries with your partner in a relationship.
Their Benefits
There are countless benefits that come with the establishment of healthy boundaries. Some of which include –
- People with strong and healthy boundaries are the most compassionate. Contrary to popular belief, setting boundaries is not selfish or mean but rather selfless and respectful.
- Your needs – both emotional and physical – will be met, so when you speak up for what you want, you are more likely to get it.
- You will feel less resentment towards people who “walk all over you” because, after the establishment of your boundaries, you are letting those around you know what your needs and expectations are.
- You will feel peace and safety when setting boundaries that are healthy and beneficial for you.
Healthy boundaries do not come easy, but if you trust your instincts, be open, and practice with your partner, the relationship will only get stronger over time.