Trigger warning: this article mentions suicide.
Oftentimes, a patriarchal society is criticized for its negative effects on women. However, it is crucial to also assess such a society in terms of its negative effects on men as well. Some of the common rules for men in a patriarchal societies include expecting men to be anti-feminine and only possess masculine qualities, objectify and conquer women, be the breadwinner and not engage in household chores, be powerful and dominant, and be emotionless unless it comes to expressing rage, aggression, and competitiveness. If a man slightly drifts from such imposed societal rules that fuel toxic masculinity, he is often met with the comments of “do not be a girl,” “do not be such a poof,” “man up,” and “boys do not cry.”
The Effects of Male Expectations
More often than not, such societal expectations lead to many negative consequences on men’s mental health. For instance, there are higher levels of suicide in men than in women, where 75% of suicide victims are males. In fact, suicide is the leading cause of death in men under 35 because many men may feel discouraged to seek help and show any sense of vulnerability. Therefore, they may first become less socially connected, while they suffer with suicidal thoughts and their mental health alone. To point out, many studies support the idea that a lack of social connection and support networks directly relates to decreased mental health and well-being.
In this way, men have a shorter life expectancy not only due to the risk of suicide, but also due to their constant strive to live up to societal standards of how to be a man. This may lead to men being more likely to avoid visiting doctors to access psychological support, struggle with discussing emotions, act more violent, engage in risky behavior, and suffer with debilitating addictions and their effects. Because of such severe mental health consequences in men, there even exists a study that looks at the need for available gender-specific treatments for men.
Many times, men may end up finding themselves in lonely cages, where they are unable to speak their minds and find meaningful authenticity and connection because they have been wired to believe that it would lessen their image of independence. As one can imagine, it is unhealthy to expect any person to constantly suppress his or her true identity and personality in order to please certain implemented gender roles. The result of this is the mere downgrading of human beings in order to create homogeneous clones that are rarely allowed to express their diverse styles, thoughts, and personalities, or to even seek necessary help in dire situations.