Trigger warning: this article discusses major depressive disorder and substance abuse.
It takes any person a lot of courage to confide and trust another with personal issues and sensitive matters and this can include an onslaught of emotions. When one puts themselves in such a vulnerable state, they would likely expect encouragement and sympathy. Men, however, are often victims to inconsiderate responses. The dismissal of their feelings is one of the main factors influencing their inability to express their feelings due to the lack of validation received from society.
The Reality of Males and their Emotions
In the MENA region today, the largely patriarchal nations allow for definitive gender roles, which brings out the issue of toxic masculinity. Men are discouraged from displaying emotions, which leads to them bottling it all up.
Suppression of emotions, more often than not, has led to the deterioration of mental health and has been associated with depressive symptoms. Such behavior can trigger abnormal emotional expression, which may lead to depression. Men tend to find it hard to accept that they are suffering from depression and attempt to displace this by overworking or even through substance abuse by relying on alcohol or drugs.
In a study carried out, men reported suppression of emotions more than women did.
As children, we are accustomed to being overly influenced by information around us as it is a primary stage of development where we constantly learn from our environment. Being raised with common phrases such as “boys should not cry” or “man up” can cause undue damage to our mindset and, in turn, even impact our mental health. Young boys are often insulted by their comparison to girls, which enforces the gender roles and also creates an inferiority complex.
What can you do?
As the world progresses in society today and the stress factors of depression increase, it is vital to quash this mindset. You can avoid making sexist comments, even if it is so much as “you throw like a girl”. This is important especially around children. Reprimanding such comments will also aid in creating a safe atmosphere for men to speak up. This safe space can be enhanced by encouraging someone to speak up and providing the support needed. Reassurance also aids in making the person feel comfortable enough to share their emotions. Avoid belittling their feelings as this will impede any progress made or even joke about it. What may seem like a joke to one in such sensitive scenarios can cause more harm than one can comprehend.
At the end of the day, it is in our human nature to feel emotions, and that cannot be linked to a specific gender. Take crying as an example. It is a biological response that can occur in humans and is often beyond our control.